im back!!! YEN is back!!

Guess Veron,my ex-colleague is right! She advised me not to dwell too much with frens dats facing relationship problems.She said it’ll make me think negatively..
And just now reading back all my past post..OMmmmGGGG!!..
I was in so much hurt and it’s just weeks ago...
And now..here I am sitting and thinking..hehe..
Honestly, maybe none wil trust me since I am so gagaga wanted to be with him so gaagaaagaa badly but buuummm!! ~ now I want to say I am over him!!!
Yes, WE are OVER centuries ago..
The point is I AM over him...huUUUh? sure boh?!!

Okie, I went out this few days and had so much fun.. I called him on Monday nite..
Talking to him..Ermm..How can I put it in words..
Actually that nite I am so DAMN pissed with a fren and I need to talk to someone..
I called my Sis, the line get disconnected so I called him as he is with my Sis.
Sis phone out of battery and she is on the way home..
So I figured,I just talk to him cause it's around 2am already..Too early to give another fren a call..

I remember there was one time I cried after I read my mom’s e-mail..I wanted to call him
We are stil together at that moment but I dun dare to do so..Funny hor,why ler?
Becox Im afraid it will go unanswered..Im already hurting..I dun need any extra surprises!!

Yes! Being around with Ice and others..These few nites..
Especially lastnite,I enjoy myself so freakingly much!
I dun need to be an angel to be treated like one!!
I enjoy the drink,the chat,the dance, the compliments,the gifts..hoho ^^…and Yes! the flirts!!
It is superbly nice to flirt around..because there is no real feelings involved!!
We just get together,have fun and have fun and have fun..FUN!!
In the flirting world,everything is FAKE and everything is just LIE!!
I love tis feelings so so much!!

Stil dun get why I am OVER him? Actually,almost- 80% of my outfits scream of seduction!! >_<
Can't entirely blame my clothes,I mean..Ermm..me and my fren wear the same shirt,the color is different but everyone say I am sexy but none say dat to her!! Damn!!
He dun like me drees sexily..So,I’ve to buy some ‘proper’ clothes wen Im out with him..-____-"
Stil remember...hehe..quite vividly,my colleagues,we planned to go for a movie in a group and bring along our spouses! I am very happy and exicted!! I can FINALLY intro him to my colleagues!!
Plus it's been quite some time we hit the cinema or should say out together!! he is always BUSY!!!
So I purposely go and shop for a new shirt! Some may find me silly but just the thought of seeing him already
send me to heaven..hehe..Yeh,slllaaaapp me!!

The plan cancelled but we still go to the movie on our own,when he saw me,he didnt say anything..
Den in the cinema,he said “Told u not to wear like dis,u stil dunwan to listen,u think very nice meh?”..
Im like..GOOoooossh!!
Do I look dat horrible in that shirt..Yup..Maybe dat shirt makes me look fat..
And i never wear it again..till recently..I went out with Michael for a movie

While waiting for him,I went to the optical shop to get my lenses and the Sales person,a malay gal said,
"Wow..I wish I have ur body" ..Duh! Do she means my boobs..Hahaha
The moment I enter Michael car,he look at me and say..WOW..u look pretty! ^^!
I just wish that will comes from his mouth .. :_(

The point is, in the past I hated him to smoke..Den he said not to smoke infront of me..
Den better, he said he quit smoking and buuUMMmm.he is back with the ciggies
I dun even mind him smoking around me anymore..as part of the reason we broke up in the past was his fren told me he isn’t himself wen he is with me..den ok loh..u want to smoke den u smoke lor..

Funny...I on the other hand have to be someone I am not when I am with him..
I CANNOT DO THIS!! I CANNOT DO THAT!!
I CANNOT WEAR LIKE THIS..I CANNOT..I CANNOT AND I CANNOT!!! Arrrgghhh!!!
The conversation just make me realized we are so so so SOOOOOO different..In everything..
Yeh,SLAP ME!! ..took me almost a decade to finally admit it! Hehehe!!

But now I am really feeling great..we are stil frens..No one to be blamed..
We are just so so SOOOOOO not meant to be together!

And yes,I will be bek to church..tis Sunday!!!! Hallelujah!
The Lord loves me terribly muchiee..
I’ve always use the transportation as an excuse for not attending church services..-_-"
And guess where is the church I am going to located at??
Just right next to my house!! Praise the Lord!!

Yeh!! I am bek!! Rainy days over!!
Goodbye SORROWS!!
HELLO..MY HAPPY SUNRISE!!!